Funny stories from my readers…

Before I forget it, Joy sent me a late photo of her daughter and family in their annual costumes. They always put a lot of thought and time into them.

As promised, I have some GREAT stories to make you laugh! I hope this brings MORE than just a smile to your face today!

The first story is from Dorothy from PA… she was the one who suggested this idea… Great story Dorothy!

THE LAST STITCH by Dorothy in PA and the World

Let me start by saying, I believe in signs. Big ones, little ones, they offer suggestions for informed decision making if you know how to interpret them.

When I moved to NY to go to grad school, my grandmother and my father bought me a sewing machine for Christmas. My mother was not part of that “gift brigade.” Clearly she knew better.

I have no idea why this particular present was under the tree. I had never given any indication that I was interested in sewing. I took the requisite sewing classes in home economics in junior high. I made a pin cushion, an apron, and a blouse. I got passing grades.

Being a seamstress to the stars was never a declared goal of mine, which is why I found this gift so puzzling. Had I somehow signaled to Santa that wanted to be a woman of the cloth or should I say fabric? I didn’t think so. Maybe Santa had gotten my Christmas list confused with my friend Nancy’s list. She did like to sew and probably would have wanted her own sewing machine. Hmmm.

Well, like a dutiful daughter (and granddaughter), I lugged the sewing machine back to New York. Don’t think “oh, cutesy little mini sewing machine that weighs 5 pounds.” No, think “MacK Truck sewing machine that would best toted in a Radio Flyer wagon.” Okay, maybe I exaggerate a bit.

In any case, I decided to “try out” the sewing machine. I bought fabric. Don’t ask me what kind. The only criteria was “pretty.” I got a pattern, probably Simplicity. The name says it all. I was going to make a two piece dress.

I cut out the pattern and started to sew the top. It had short puffed sleeves. I dreamed of how stylish I would be wearing this new outfit. I thought of how envious my friends would be that I had mastered the techniques of sewing on my very first try. I mused at how many other outfits I could whip up with my new acquired talent.

Final stitch sewn. Foot off pedal. Bobbin thread clipped.

Now to behold my masterpiece!

Wait, what? One sleeve was puffed. It looked, kind of, sort of alright. The other sleeve was puffed too but upside down. The puff part was under the arm, not above it.

Oh no! I had failed. I had come this far and I was defeated.

A voice inside my head whispered, well, duh, you could just rip it out and start over. No, I replied to myself. This is a sign! The universe is telling me to stop here, stop now, never sew again.

So the fabric went into the trash can. The skirt was never even attempted. How much artistic trauma can one person endure?

The sewing machine was packed up and eventually given to a friend. My father (and grandmother) and I had a don’t ask/don’t tell pact. And I never sewed again! THE END

The next story is from Sissy Lingle and she gave a Video presentation that will never be forgotten!

In 2020, MDCC had a virtual convention, first time ever. I had been scheduled to give a workshop on making my “Dolly H’uggs” boots. These are made from my pattern out of that bonded faux suede/sherpa fabric. I had a good number signed up and paid so had to figure out how to teach it online. I sent the kits out early and told them to have the size they wanted already cut out. Then I made a video of my self teaching and actually sewing a boot so they could sew along with me. I had NEVER made a video like this by myself and did it with my ipad on the dining room table. I didn’t realize that what I was seeing was backwards of what the actual video would be and kept moving myself around trying to make it look right, LOL! It lasted nearly an hour, but it must have been ok because I got a several more requests for kits after it was shown at the virtual convention. They did remark that I gave them a lot of laughs! Well, that is what you get when an old lady does that for the first time!

Paula tried her hardest to make an outfit for her sister… but I’m just wondering if ANYONE took any pictures?

One year for my older sister’s birthday, I wanted to make her a complete outfit to wear. The joke was this: I can’t sew at all! (I can sew buttons on though.) My sister sewed since she was a teenager and like Jeanne, made beautiful clothes for herself and when several of us girls, sisters and friends. started collecting dolls, she sewed doll clothes for us too.

This was a planned birthday party where we were to make her a gift or give her a funny elephant gift.

Anyway, here’s how I made her this outfit.
I had a friend lay down on a large piece of paper and I drew around the body of my friend and created slacks and a blouse pattern. I cut the pattern off of the large paper, then proceeded to cut material using that pattern for the top and pants. Once the material was cut, (now these were flat pieces of material – not enough material for the sides of the upper body or legs ) I stapled the flat pieces of material together. I also stapled a collar and cuffs onto the blouse. If I remember right, I glued buttons on and used tape for the hems of the pants and cuffs. I may have used other techniques too for a few decorations on the blouse.
In my mind, this was the sewing technique of a person like me who had no clue how to sew!
She opened this gift at that birthday party and she and I had a good laugh. Just so you know, I did give her a nice gift later.
~ Paula

Charlotte submitted a sewing AND a cooking story… she’s been sewing a LONG time and I bet she has oodles of stories!

I have a couple of funny stories to share. Well, one isn’t really So funny, but maybe a little amusing!

Sewing: When I was about 16, we were living out here in Seattle. I’d been in 4H for four years back in Michigan, so I still sewed for myself occasionally, even though I wasn’t in 4H, and was no longer in Home Ec. I remember making a pair of pajamas for myself, and carefully sewing up the leg, pivoting, and then continuing up the crotch! I soon figured out that my body didn’t divide in half that far up, so I took out the crotch seam stitching in both halves, and put them together correctly! Another time, I was making a skirt–beautiful cream/pink houndstooth check wool. I got the zipper in, and realized it was not on the left side, it was on the right! Painfully picked out those teeny little stitches (which of course sank Deeply into the plush wool) and sewed that side up and put it in the other side. Ah. Oops. It lapped back over front, instead of front over back! At this time, I handed it to my mother and said, “Here–YOU finish it!!” (She did, and I enjoyed wearing it for several years.)

Cooking: I had gone out for some reason (a meeting at church, to the store, whatever) and Ron and our son Daniel, who was about 14 at the time, stayed home. When I got home, I could smell….Something! Daniel proudly announced he had made chocolate chip cookies in the jellyroll pan, like it says you can do on the package. Hmm, didn’t Smell like cookies! I looked in the oven, and here was this stuff bubbling away in my pan!! I quickly took it out of the oven (the timer still had 15 min. to go, at which time the pan would have been ruined!), and asked Daniel to show me the recipe. We went over it, and I asked if he had put that amount of flour in it. Well, no, he didn’t think so. We had a little talk about why it’s important to MEASURE the ingredients carefully before we mix and bake!! He had essentially made candy in the oven!! Some got eaten, but some ended up getting thrown away, I’m afraid.

“Kathie’s Kamping Kapers!”

We always tried to take the kids on a vacation every summer. Getting everything ready and the four kids things ready was busy, busy! The kids on this trip were teens and were most times helpful. I had looked at my hair the night before vacation and decided it needed coloring. I had the supplies so mixed it up and let it set while I did last minute packing . Washed it out and went to bed. The surprise the next morning was a color much darker than my usual. I tried not to panic and proceeded to wash it… my idea was to mix some Clorox in the shampoo and hopefully that would lighten my way-too-dark hair. But because I woke with a horrid headache I went for the bottle of Excedrin first…. Gulped two of them down only to realize I had grabbed the little glass of Clorox I had poured to mix with shampoo…not the glass of water!! I hated to admit doing something so stupid although the rest of the family were either laughing or trying to be concerned. My oldest daughter took charge and called the Poison Control Center. She was so grown up and answered all the questions they asked…until it came to the age of the “child” so she giggled and told them “43”. We could even hear the Poison Control person laughing!
Thinking about it now I don’t remember how my hair turned out… but we did have a memorable trip to the Black Hills👏👏

Kathie, Kathie, Kathie… just SO glad you were okay!

Joy’s Latest Dolly Caper… I just had to share it!

Well, I had been expecting two new dolls from RRFF and had received the usual email from them that they were on the way and had the tracking number. I tracked the package for a couple of days and it was still in Hong Kong. Then, I received a second email from RRFF telling me that another doll had also shipped. What? Now two shipments. You know what that means. “Operation how to get the packages inside without detection from other person” must begin. Another tracking number to track. Did a search and the info came up arriving Nov. 3rd. Seemed right. Then, I talked to Sally, and she had the same thing happen. Only, she was wise enough to note that the tracking numbers were the same. What? That must be why the number seemed so familiar. Duh! So, I had one, probably large package with three dolls arriving. Latest tracking said Nov. 2nd. Oh no, not much time to devise a plan.

So, yesterday, Halloween, I was busy in the morning but when I got back, I checked my email, and there was an update I had requested from DHL. The package was out for delivery!! Ah, what am I going to do? It’s Halloween. Don’t want that box sitting on the porch or under the bench, and DHL does not have Follow the Truck to get a general idea of delivery time. I think it said by 7:00PM. Oh great, in the dark as well. So, we had to do a few more things, so off we went and upon our return, no box. Phew, couldn’t have explained that one. Inside, I got other person working on getting information on his great grandfather so we can send for his Civil War records. As I happened to walk into the kitchen, I noticed a bright yellow DHL truck in front of the house. Oh no, the delivery was near. What to do? Oh, I hope he doesn’t ring the bell with this out of country package. Went into the office and talked to other person about some cousins and a census. Didn’t hear a thing. Came back into the living room and ever so carefully turned that squeaky doorknob and popped opened the door. No package on the mat. Now what? Wrong truck? I’ve never seen that truck around here, so it must have been the one. Maybe the delivery person left it at the bottom of the steps? Opened the door further and glanced to the left. Ah, there it was just beyond the planter. With other person still in the office and trick or treating to begin soon, I stooped to pick up the box and discovered that it weighed well, a ton! Three of those dolls in their boxes make for one large, weighty, package. Using both hands to lift the monolith box, I managed to heave it back inside and deposit it by the couch. Why I chose that spot, I have no idea. I should have just braved the weight and carried it directly to another location, but my mind was reeling and confused me I guess. Not a sound from the office. Good! So, using my superpowers, I lifted the parcel, balancing it carefully as I tiptoed through the kitchen and literally dumped the box in its unnoticed hiding place. And there it remains. I will need lots of space and a time without other person loitering around to cut the tape and pry out the decorative boxes. But, the dollies are safely here two days early after their long journey from Hong Kong. So excited. I just can’t wait to open that box! Not much of a caper, but successful just the same. 🙂

Sounds like a “caper” to me, Joy!

I have 2 stories to share… the first I’ll call That blasted TREE STUMP!

I wrote about this in a post back in March of 2015…

I was in 4-H for mainly one reason… because I loved to sew! Sure, I was involved in the cooking and the Share-the-Fun activities, and a few other things, but my heart was mostly there for one reason…to sew and to see if what I made was good enough to make it to State. You made an outfit and then it was judged by some very strict judges and tough guidelines. If you were fortunate enough to pass the scrutiny and get a high score on it, you could either send your outfit to the State Fair, where they would be all be displayed on mannequins or on a showcase wall, or if you happened to be able to go to the State Fair, you could model your outfit in a big Fashion Show. You couldn’t go in person every year, but I think about every 3 years, if I remember correctly.

Well, this one year, I think I was 15, I made a dress and was hoping it was good enough. You’ve seen it before in a photo I showed when I received my 70’s Julie doll. That’s me in the front row on the left side and that’s the dress.

Remember this is the 1970’s…The dress was a burgundy knit, but not a polyester double knit or a cotton knit like tee shirts. It had a little bit of nubby-ness to it and was sort of close to a boucle knit if you know what that is. It was soft but had a bit of body to it. Then it had little knit scarf that I wore around my neck. It looks terribly silly when I see it now.

Okay, so here’s the story: I made it to the State Fair and had all the necessary things I needed for modeling…the dress, scarf, slip, hose, dress shoes, all the things I needed to look “good!” We were shown the stage but we didn’t actually practice on it. It was your typical “fashion runway” where most of the activity is on the stage area but there was a runway that extended past the stage out into the audience. The stage wasn’t so high that people would see up our dresses, but it was off the ground somewhat. We got instructions on how it would happen and they showed us how to pivot and make the turn at the end of the runway and come back to our seats. Seems simple, right?

Well, the actual night of the Fashion Show, we arrived on stage and there were “stumps” all over the stage… Yes, tree stumps…rough cut I might add. They were about 20 inches high and those were our seats. We had been assigned where we would be sitting and my seat was the one right at the beginning of the runway, at the edge of the stage, sort of like this quick drawing I just did…

We all got in our places and on our stumps… Now remember this is the 70’s and remember those short dresses! I wasn’t the most confident young lady on the planet and grace wasn’t necessarily my strong suit, but I was determined to model my dress. It seemed like forever but they finally called my name and I stood up to start down the short runway. As I stood up I felt something pull on the backside of my leg. I took one step and I felt the pull tighten around my thigh. To my horror, I realized my panty hose had gotten caught on the stump and as I walked a thread was stretching and I didn’t know what to do. I’m sure with the lights dimmed in the audience everyone could see what probably looked like a spider web coming out from under my dress! I kept going and a few steps down the runway I felt a “SNAP” almost like a rubber band and awkwardly jolted forward. I figured I had probably pulled a large snag or even a runner down the back of my panty hose and it was visible to everyone in the audience. I wanted to cry, but just smiled, pivoted and returned back to my stump. Later when were done, I checked and I had a hole about the size of half dollar in the back of my panty hose! “sigh”

Oh well… I think that was the last of my 4-H modeling. I can still remember that feeling and now I can laugh about it, but then… I wanted to crawl in a hole and just hide.

Here is the other post… written January 2015… I’ll call it the case of the inside/outside raincoat!

I have been wanting to share a story with you about a time when “I” was the model and what happened. Unfortunately I have searched in all of my pictures and can’t find the one picture I wanted to share with you about what I was modeling, so I will have to do my very best with my wording of this story to paint this picture for you.

I majored in Clothing and Textiles in college with an emphasis on Apparel Design. Not only did we do lots of construction, tailoring, drawing and draping fabrics, but one big event we had each year was an outdoor Spring Fashion Show. Parents and friends were all invited and it was a BIG deal to us because we had all worked so hard on our outfits. We were required to model two outfits, and most everyone modeled them separately. I decided to get my modeling over in one run, so I made a pretty pastel suit and a raincoat that could be worn together.

My suit was a linen like fabric with the design in aquas and pale pinks on a cream background. The skirt was a short swing type skirt and the suit jacket was a simple one button in the front style. My raincoat was like no other. I found this fabulous (remember we’re in the 70’s here…) gold fabric at a place called Hunter Salvage and thought I had found a gold mine. This fabric was so incredible…it was shiny gold, sort of like lame’ (if you know what that is) and had an attached lining to the inside of it with a small print. It was really flexible and easy to work with….AND it was only $1.00 a yard! I was sure it would be a hit! The style I made was your typical raincoat…double pockets on the front, lapels, belt loops, shoulder epaulets, and LOTS of topstitching! Sort of like this…

…and close to this color…

Okay, so it’s getting close to the time when I’m supposed to go out…My biggest fear was tripping, so I was mainly concerned with walking smoothly! I hear my name called and it’s time… I make my way to the runway and hear a few ooohs and aaaahhs over the gold raincoat. (Sorry, but it was really neat!) As I’m walking I begin unbuttoning it so I can show my suit underneath. I try slipping it off and…and… UNFORTUNATELY I HAD FORGOTTEN TO BUTTON MY SUIT JACKET… so guess what happened? My suit jacket came off inside the sleeves of my raincoat…and it got all tangled up trying to pull the suit jacket out. It was a mess, but I just smiled and kept walking…silly me….SILLY BUTTON!

My 15 minutes of fame and I blew it!

Well, I hope that was enough to make you smile several times today! I sure hope I didn’t miss anyone1 Hope you enjoyed the stories and thanks to everyone who contributed!

See you tomorrow,
Blessings, Jeanne